walk away

at the bar
i enjoy flirting with women
the ones with fake tits and fake smiles
even the ugly girls, fat and greasy
i feel the urge to fuck them as we talk
but then
when i sense they want the same
i lose all interest
and get filled with disgust
that's when they lean in for a kiss
and i walk away

synopsis of a suburban psychosis

(written with Petter and Ashley)


i don't like bugs, man
they're on to me with their beady eyes
exoskeletal spies
they crawl up my anus when i sleep
rearrange my dreams
my b-b-b-brain is seeping, creaking
improper thoughts are leaking
they know all about my responsibilities
and the filth! oh the filth!
they slurp it and they stare
in the heat of the hedonistic hellfire
are they laying eggs?
egg-brain!
hatching judgment

i don't wanna talk about bugs anymore

naked flower-stick

(written with Petter and Ashley)


watch out for my beating-stick
i warned myself
my anger has been collecting dust
but i will polish it
is it beautiful?
it's skewed and dark, that much is obvious
i'm a hunter when i'm naked
my opinions chew your meat
your meat is neat
my marbles are brass
i will stick my beating prick up your ass
then give you flowers to cover up the mad
it's kinda sad
i only feel when i feel bad
will this ever end
this self-inflicted blame
one time i want less of the same

the other day, was a year ago

the other day, was a year ago
my mind wandered i guess
it does that sometimes
and my life is passing by
if you ask what i've done
i will laugh
loud and confident
and point to these words
you see?
i wrote a poem
what else do you want from me, you maggot?

one day i'll be old
it happens so fast
my mind will wander
and never come back
so you don't like this poem, you bastard?
well, i wrote it one day when my mind wasn't there
and i'm good at pretending
that i really don't care

goddamn this nonsense

there is something stuck in my brain

i have painful lumps of shame
angry pieces of memory stuck in my mind
in the corners and corridors
clogging my brain
killing any chance of sane conversations
the pills i took
i let them down
but pills are merely make-up
disguising the most disgusting of emotions
i've read the labels
searched the shelves
but what i'm looking for
it isn't there
mental-floss
for mental care

lawn-chair

oh, those late nights in my courtyard
sweating from that mean summer heat
the bluegrass from inside reach my lawn-chair
fills me with sin
my foot tapping gently along to the rhythm
the mosquito suck my blood
but i let it
cold beers, sweet tears, in the light from my porch
that single uncovered light-bulb, adding a faint buzz to the music
i add my own words to the summer sounds
then i fall asleep there
in my lawn-chair
the mosquito suck my blood
and i let it

...

was thinking today
about how much i hate homeless people
and how bad i feel
for stray kittens

sad-corner

i have a good friend
sometimes he is in the sad-corner
he is small in the night
i will talk into the shadow
try to see him
i stare until my mind gets dark
and my eyes see
what he sees
then i'm right there with him
in the sad-corner
it's not that bad to get lost
if you're not alone

bird by the pool

i once wished that i was a bird
it's silly, i know
i don't remember what kind of bird
but that's not important
i wouldn't be flying all that much
just stroll around, poolside at the mirage hotel in las vegas
i would dip my beak in the water on those hot desert days
and suck on cherries from drinks left behind
it's not that much about being a bird
more a fear of responsibility
but maybe birds have responsibilities too
i don't know
do you?

my wall

years ago in Oslo
when it was always winter
i would take too many pills
because i was always drunk
and i would forget that i had taken my pills
my couch got old while i was sitting there
the wall got tired of me staring at it
and it disappeared
i could hear the drunks outside
laughing and singing
man, how i hated them
i was drunk inside
staring at nothing
where my wall used to be
and i disappeared

toilet

isn't it awful
using other peoples toilet
when you take a shit
and you really have to go
but it's so hard
cause you're nervous they might hear you
and when you're done
there is no toilet-brush and no air-freshener
and the porcelain has a stripe of brown shit going down it
and it smells
and you're nervous
cause someone is gonna walk in right after you
and then you have to meet their faces at the table later
they all stare at you
and you're nervous