time to appreciate

in old westerns
some poor guy always gets shot in the stomach.
a good guy, but not the lead.
it may take hours,
sometimes days
to die from such injuries.
slow,
painful, but
a good way to go i believe.
just enough time
to lose all shame
or ambitions.
total freedom
and the time to appreciate.
as you drift into a dream
the gaping, gushing hole
speaks to you
a promise of rest.
that is how i would leave
i'm a good guy
but i was never the lead