colorblind

always new drugs to quit.
pills that taste like green and blue and yellow.
it's a soothing sickness,
plush and cloudy in all respects.
several demons,
green and blue and yellow,
resting on my shoulders.
then they get me,
and only alcohol can wash away
the taste of color.
wash me away from me,
lick the sobriety off my skin.
the umbilical strangulation
of that past
and now
and kill
my
eyes.
i got those colors in my head now, but
i don't want to see.
don't want to breathe.